Courage and Self-Doubt – Your Inner Bully as a Catalyst
Adventures in Awareness Issue #8
“I’ve come to realize that courage isn’t about feeling brave, it’s a willingness to move through an assumption and pass out the other side. And every time I confront this bully of self-doubt and make headway, my self-respect grows.” - Jay Fulcher, Contemplative, Colleague, Friend- Richard Thomas, actor (13 Jun 1951- )
Tomorrow brings us New Moon, which signals a time to go within and take stock [see the ‘energy soup’ below]. This month is also about ‘new alignment’ for liberation: liberation from limiting thoughts, beliefs, attitudes and yes, liberation from our very own ‘Inner Bully’. [Please see the quote in the sidebar from my colleague and friend Jay].
As I’ve been walking through my process of inner reflection for what’s next and have moved forward with new and exciting opportunities, I’ve noticed that at times my Inner Bully speaks up with self-doubt phrases like, “What you have to say has all been said before, so why bother?”. Or it says, “Who do you think you are…?”. This same type of inner dialog is also showing up for my clients as we explore what’s ahead for them, leading to feelings of fear and frustration; fleeting they may be, but present nonetheless. It helps me to remember that although what I have to offer may not be ‘new’, my perspective on it is unique and deserves to be offered from my heart as I share Life with my fellow journeyers.
For me, the key has been to remember that I have a CHOICE about how I respond - or not - to my Inner Bully’s concerns. As a ‘new alignment’, I’ve chosen to listen, consider what has been said, and then take it into a quiet meditation time; the question I pose to myself is, “What is most important for me to pay attention to here?”. In using this strategy, more often than not, my Inner Bully’s message has served to slow me down just enough to see a pothole ahead of which I wasn’t yet aware. Or I realize I can purposefully choose to allow my feelings of fear or frustration to spark the courage I require to move ahead with determination confidence. Instead of resisting the Inner Bully, I’ve chosen to partner with it a catalyst that reminds me to stop, go within, choose and then move.
How about you? As you’ve been contemplating ‘new alignment’, what have you been noticing your Inner Bully is saying to you? How have you been responding? As we contemplate the questions below, this New Moon’s energy can support each of us in transmuting fear & frustration into the courage necessary to ‘feel the fear and do it anyway.’
QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF
Per Stephanie Austin, EcoAstrology: As the first earth sign in the zodiac, Taurus turns our attention towards the physical world, prompting us to fully appreciate the Earth, our body, and the many joys of being alive. Taurus is also concerned with resources, values, and self-esteem. A new moon in Taurus asks us to reflect on:
What really matters?
What is worth my precious time and energy?
Where am I ready for less struggle and more ease?
How can I have more health in my body, love in my heart, and peace in my spirit?
I invite you to consider one or more of these question and, as you do, notice what new awareness emerges from within you. And please remember to have FUN on that awareness adventure into the question, okay?
THE ENERGY SOUP REPORT:
Since we’re inextricably interconnected to each other, our planet, and our universe, here is some of the ‘energy soup’ we’re all swimming in right now:
Mercury Retrograde: May 18 thru June 11 - Periods of Mercury Retrograde represent a time to go within, double-check all communications for accuracy, repair communications errors, contemplate upcoming opportunities, and rejuvenate; a reminder of the natural rhythms of Life.
New Moon in Taurus - May 17 9:14 PM PDT / May 18 4:14 AM UT - New Moons are another reminder that in the natural rhythm of life, time to slow down and reflect before moving forward again is a key to clarity. The New Moon is an excellent opportunity to revisit the VOID and to start over.
Beginning at the New Moon on May 18th, our responsibilities increase and demand more attention. We may not have enough help to get all the required tasks done, and what help we do have may be confused enough to cause more challenges. The cycle associated with lots of responsibilities peaks on May 22nd and stays in range through May 28th. The other cycle, associated with taking deceptive or confusing actions, or possibly becoming sick (Mars square Neptune) peaks on May 25th and stays in range through June 4th. In addition, a third cycle gets into the mix (Mercury conjunct Mars, and square Neptune) which makes matters worse. This cycle adds mental confusion, fear, and the potential for accidents. This cycle is in range from May 20th through June 1st. It peaks on May 27th.
This particular new moon reminds us that we, and everything in the universe, are light in motion, dancing through time and space to the rhythms of the cosmos. We are more than a mere conglomeration of blood, bones, and brain. We are light — both particle and wave — a coherent flow of photons which shapes our DNA, cells, organs, and the thousands of biochemical processes taking place every second in our body. Quantum biology tells us that each part of our physiology functions via the passage of photons, regulated by a master clock in our hypothalamus, the suprachiasmatic nucleus (SCN). This tiny region of our brain controls our circadian rhythms, which affect our hormone levels, immune function, and alertness. The SCN, in turn, is governed by the cerebrospinal fluid in our brain and spinal column, an antenna that resonates with the Earth’s magnetic field and other sources of electromagnetic energy, including solar, planetary, and interstellar radiation.
This is a deep reset time. You may experience a drop in your energy and feel like hibernating most of the day. This is deep assimilation and should be honored as a still point in your life. Acknowledge the earth and the grounding that Pacha Mama provides. Honor the Sun and its life giving properties. This is also a good day to revisit your priorities and determine once again what may be out of balance. Make a commitment to re-balance what needs it. If there are still things that need clearing out in order for you to be more balanced, make a plan for that to happen. It is important to be able to stop, rest and come to a still point around this New Moon. It is OK to feel unmotivated.
Cosmic*Intelligence*Agency - This is just the firm footing that we can all benefit from as Mercury, the “cosmic magician,” stations retrograde on the 19th 01:49:05 UT at 13º Gemini. Expect Mercury to wind itself all the way back to the 4º Gemini before the messenger god of commerce and dreams stations direct on June 11th. You know the deal. Time to repeat, retry, redo, re-evaluate, and re-create, many things that you did between April 30th and May 19th. So you can rush if you want to, but deliberate, mindful communications are the most efficient and reliable suggestion during May. Keep in mind that intuition is always your best bet during Mercury Rx. Especially when you can’t remember all the details.
We have had the theme of “alignment” before at various times but this month’s focus is different as the main word to pay attention to is NEW…These times are amazing, unsettled, a bit overwhelming and confusing, scary but awesome at the same time, and full of new opportunities. What is needed now is integration and assimilation that will help create a new alignment serving as a new platform from which we can move forward. Because everything is different, NEW is the word to keep in mind. It would not serve to try and force things back to an old alignment. Don’t wait for things to “get back to normal” because you may be waiting a long time. The key is to embrace what is new and different and allow the new and different to integrate into your life in some way. This may require really letting go of old expectations or the way you thought things should have been. Work with what you have rather than pining after what you don’t have.
May 2-May 29 is the “Spectral Moon [Month] of Liberation” according to the Mayan Natural Time Calendar - its energies are Dissolve-Release-Liberation: “In order to evolve you must learn something new.”
ICF Midwest Conference – Theme: “Getting to the Heart of the Matter” June 18-20, 2015 in Kansas City MO - my educational breakout session is entitled “Mentor Coaching: A Pathway to the Heart & Art of Coaching - Who Knew?!?!”
ICF Competency Brush-Up Program – 18.0 ICF CCEs [in core competencies] - I designed and love leading this program - next offering begins August 26, 2015 - already filling
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